February 2005

I failed my CTI Oral Certification Exam, how do I gain the confidence to retake it?

by Judith Cohen

Dear Judith:
I took my CTI Certification exam two years ago but didn’t pass the oral portion. My life came totally unraveled just before the exam date but I went ahead with it anyway. I wasn’t strong enough to “get back on the horse” so I have yet to achieve my CPCC designation. I’m finally ready to climb back on but still don’t have the confidence that I once had. Any suggestions?
S.K.

Dear S.K.:
Congratulations! Asking for help is the first step in getting back on the horse. You don’t have to do this alone. Remember that phrase, “naturally, creative, resourceful and whole?” Now is the time to start paying attention to the resourceful part and not only call forth your own wisdom but let others help you prepare for the exam. By the way, it will help if you also pay attention to the other words in that phrase. When you as coach believe them to be true for yourself, you will also believe them to be true for your clients.

In nine years of examining people, I have found one thing to be true. Hardly anyone fails the exam because they are a bad coach. The main reason that people fail their exams is that they send their gremlins to take the exam rather than themselves. If you keep your gremlin out of the room and demonstrate competent Co-Active coaching, you’ll pass the exam. We are not looking for perfection. We are just looking for a demonstration of competent Co-Active coaching. You can do it!

As for specific suggestions, here are a few:

  1. Assist at the In the Bones course. If you haven’t already taken it, take it. It’s a great overview and integration of all the previous workshops and it really does have you get Co-Activity in your bones.

  2. Coach as many people as you possibly can and get feedback on your coaching. Ask for what worked and what didn’t work. It would be particularly helpful to practice on CPCCs as they can give you specific feedback regarding the items on the stat sheet.

  3. If you haven’t made use of the free debrief offer that accompanied your exam tape, call CTI and see if one of your examiners is available to go over your tape with you. Although two years have passed, it might still be possible to have one of your examiners debrief your exam (if you still have the tape). If you’ve already had your debrief, it could be helpful to hire someone to work with you for a couple of sessions just to help you brush up on your skills.

  4. When people who have failed their exam ask me about preparing for their retake exam, I always have them imagine the last time that they made incredibly passionate love with someone. Then I ask them if they coached on their exam the same way that they made love. Fortunately, for their lovers, they didn’t make love the way that they coached. By that I mean, you have to be fully present with your client, you have to make passionate love to their Big A agenda and you have to look, feel and act ALIVE while you’re coaching them. Making love is not a thinking thing. It’s an experiential event, as is good Co-Active coaching. It’s not necessary to bring your client to orgasm, but we need to see that you are at least on the path to getting there. So practice “making love to your client’s Big A agenda.”

  5. Coach your coach and ask for feedback.

  6. Listen to the Exam Prep call. It’s on Audio Podium, 918-222-7201, box 506.

I think that should get you started. Feel free to contact me if you have more questions. Again, congratulations on getting back on the horse. Your willingness to do so demonstrates to me that you are exactly the kind of coach that I want to have in our profession. You’ve been undaunted by failing and that is a skill that everyone needs to learn. Think of the gift you’ll give your clients knowing that you’ve looked your fear in the eye and succeeded!

Warmly,
Judith

ADHD Coaching Model

by Judith Cohen

Dear Judith:
I am curious to know what is CTI’s model about ADHD. Can I find any matter about this subject on the CTI site?
Regards,
S. A.

Dear S. A.:
CTI doesn’t have a specific model for ADHD. The Co-Active Coaching model holds all people “naturally creative, resourceful and whole.” One of the main cornerstones of the Co-Active Coaching model is that coaches coach their client’s whole life. We see the person first rather than their diagnosis. In my experience of working with adults with ADHD, I have found that each one of them has suffered at some point from the stigma of being labeled as a problem. The first piece of work to be done is to separate the person from the interpretation of ADHD as a problem. One of the gifts of the Co-Active Coaching model is to turn this “problem” into something that can actually work for the client rather than being seen only as a deficit.

Within that context, it is important for the client and the coach to design an alliance that specifically works for the client. Symptoms such as impulsivity, lack of focus, inability to finish projects can be dealt with by creating the client’s awareness of his or her impact, structures to focus their attention and lots of accountability. Above and beyond that, each person with ADHD has his or her own Big A agenda (their life vision, who they wish to become). I have found that focusing on what people most deeply desire in their lives also serves to help manage some of their symptoms.

The people that I have coached with ADHD have been creative, bright, determined and fun to coach. They have shown me that this model does work for varied groups of people precisely because each coaching relationship is custom-designed between coach and client.

There are many coaches who specialize in working with people with ADHD. If you would like a referral to a CTI coach, I’d be happy to provide you with names of some people or you could check out the ADHD coaching community within the Co-Active Network.

Warmly,
Judith